What I Needed: An Open Letter to Therapists from a Detransitioner

Originally posted at Youth Trans Critical Professionals

The main thing I wish were different about the therapy I received before and during my transition is I wish my therapists had been trauma competent.

I was in therapy right after my college rape. I was in therapy for the many years I was wondering if I was some kind of trans. I was in therapy when I decided I was trans and needed to get my letters for hormones and surgery.

All three therapists knew about my college rape. All three therapists knew about my stressful childhood in a home with daily violence. The second two therapists knew about me going through an experience of being virally hated on on the internet. Looking back, knowing about dissociative states, it’s crystal clear that was a traumatic experience I had classic trauma reactions to- dissociation, depression, anxiety, avoidance. We talked over my rape. We talked over my childhood. We talked over a pack of strangers hating me on the internet. We talked and talked and talked.

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I’m a leftist and I support NC’s bathroom stipulations

Originally posted at The Fifth Column

If you had told my younger self that I would be writing an article in support of Republican legislation I might have laughed at you. But as a leftist who prioritizes women’s rights I find myself in support of Republican Gov. McRory and the new bathroom laws in my state of North Carolina.

All mainstream discussions of North Carolina’s new bathroom laws are using memes to criticize it. Which is useful if you’re not a fan of critical thinking, but it seems memes and messages like them are adequate legal arguments in the court of public opinion. So what’s the deal?

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Rape culture involves making targets feel bad about their boundaries

Originally posted at Stop Trans Chauvinism

An inherent part of rape culture is trying to put on the defensive those who raise concerns about predatory behaviour happening in front of or to them (or policy which enables it), or are in the classes of people most predated on (women and children), who might also conceivably object. The aim is to make them feel as though they are doing something wrong.

Accordingly, those invested in rape culture need to make targets and potential targets feel upfront – even ahead of time – that their boundaries and concerns are wrong. Preparing ground by ensuring that potential targets know to feel badly about thinking critically of them, and don’t gather allies against predation (but maybe even distance themselves from likely allies), is a common activity of predators.

Predators and their enablers achieve this quite easily when they apply a ‘reversal’ to what’s really going on, by making the targets/ targetted classes sound like the predatory ones.

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Your meme is stupid, and it makes you look stupid.

Originally posted at Secretly Radical

OF COURSE NOT ALL TRANSWOMEN ARE CRIMINALS. Some of the best male people I know are transwomen.
HOWEVER.
1) ALL TRANSWOMEN ARE MALE;
2) MALES AS A CLASS ARE A DANGER TO WOMEN AND CHILDREN;
3) THE LABEL “TRANSGENDER” REQUIRES NO MEANINGFUL TRANSITION;
4) TRANSITION DOES NOT RENDER A MALE PERSON HARMLESS.
THE ISSUE IS NOT TRANS PEOPLE USING PUBLIC RESTROOMS.
THE ISSUE IS MALE PEOPLE USING FEMALE RESTROOMS.
If males are not dangerous, why do we have sex-segregated bathrooms in the first place? And what the Hell do you think actual transwomen are afraid of in the men’s room? Evil urinals? No, it’s males. If their fears are valid, why piss on the fears of female people??

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Shrinking to survive: A former trans man reports on life inside queer youth culture

Originally posted at 4th Wave Now

There is power in naming. It’s how we find each other, how we connect to our histories, how we connect to our futures. Driving us apart from each other is the easiest way to keep us from learning to recognize attempts to redefine our realities.

I didn’t know this then. I subscribed to an incredibly misogynistic set of beliefs for years. “DFAB privilege” was a common phrase in our community – “designated female at birth privilege.” It was accepted fact that being born female gave you a lifelong advantage over a male who transitioned. This included men who used transition only to mean using different pronouns on Tumblr and having an anime girl as their avatar. We believed that, as “dfabs,” we needed to shut up about our petty problems. We could never have it as hard as any “dmab women or non-binary people.” Everyone in the trans community agreed that it was our responsibility to uplift “dmab voices.” None of this seemed outrageous or strange to me; it felt pretty intuitive. Growing up under male domination is a grooming process that leaves many girls and women extremely vulnerable to manipulation.

The first experience that did make me start to feel suspicious of male transition was when I was 18 and a genderqueer-identifying man who had never pursued any kind of transition raped my best friend, a woman unacquainted with insular trans community politics.

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There Is No Such Thing as a Lesbian With a Penis!

Originally posted on YouTube by Magdelan Berns

Keep men out of women’s restrooms

Originally published by the Chicago Tribune

There is a bully in our country that has been body-building for the last 25 years. That bully has now “come out” and is flexing its muscles, sending fear down the spines of our politically correct population.

There are untold numbers of people who do not speak out for fear of being ostracized or being called bigots. They are not bad people, nor are they bigots. They have simply succumbed to the sound of silence. And as Simon and Garfunkel’s “The Sound of Silence” song goes, silence, like a cancer, grows.

The bully is political correctness, and it does not scare me.

I live in North Carolina, and I support the new controversial state law that says people must use the bathroom that corresponds with the sex listed on their birth certificates. However, the law is flawed — the part that allows for LGBT people to be discriminated against in employment should be repealed.

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