How to Be An Ally to Cis-Women

Posted at Alice Domurat Dreger

I’m getting lectured lately on how I am “failing to be an ally” to transgender people, especially transgender women. This charge has been leveled at me recently because I have (a) referred to a girl-identified child as having been “born with a male body”; (b) pointed to data showing that most gender nonconforming and gender dysphoric children do not grow up to be trans; and (c) written about autogynephilia which, if you’ve read my latest book, you know is a no-no among certain circles.

So I’m thinking it is my turn to provide transwomen some advice about how to be an ally to cis-women, particularly those of us who are feminist. (For those of you unfamiliar with the term, “cis” means identifying with the gender you were assigned at birth; it’s the opposite of being transgender, and it’s what most of us are.)

Let me note that a lot of the transwomen I know don’t need this list—in fact, they could write it because they live by it—but a few seem to:

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